Becca’s Betrayal/Marriage
When I’m out of juice, as it were, Becca Trabin, TTWS intern, should really step up to the plate, you know? But instead she contributed a blog entry to our style blog, which the very cool cat-lover Erica Palan edits. Now style is fun and all, but are the stakes really that high? Vegan boots vs. crazy? No contest.
Thus, in my infirmity, I’m forced to post myself. Sigh. Kids these days.
Today I read about an illness I never heard of: Post-Nuptial Depression:
Stephanie Savill spent much of her honeymoon in tears. Her wedding in West Sussex had been a fabulous affair. Every detail, from the ribbons and decorative butterflies adorning the marquee to the hand-made invitations, had been meticulously planned with no expense spared. Even the weather on the day was perfect.
After such a triumph, it was perhaps inevitable that the 33-year-old PA from Winchester would find the first week of life as a newlywed something of an anticlimax, even if she was staying in a romantic Cornish cottage. But her mood did not improve on her return home. On the contrary, within a month, her marriage was under huge strain and she was questioning everything in her life, from her relationship to her career.
Stephanie is one of a growing number of brides who suffer what has been termed Post-Nuptial Depression (PND) - a syndrome where brides who have been building up to their big day find the day-to-day grind of married life, well, rather mundane.
Liz | 3:26 PM | Uncategorized
I hesitate to belittle anyone’s pain. I am sorry that women, who have dreamed of the bliss of married life, find it less than their fantasy. But that may be at the core of it.
It seems that many highly anticipated events result in let-downs, emotional hang-overs and unforeseen strife.
As women, we grow up with conflicting messages. We can have a career, a family, fulfillment of dreams and more, more, MORE!
Women chose to wear white to their church wedding, when the virginal status is at best, doubtful. The White Wedding is too often a myth and clothed by fairy tales, with marital bliss tacked on.
All relationships take work, which is uncomfortable for many of us. But if we wrap our relationship in a glittery package, hoping that when it’s opened, it will continue to shine, then we will lose.
If we take time to know our potential life-partners, if we are truly honest and divested, then we will bless our marriage more than a single, expensive and sometimes, regrettable day.
Oh, and can I apply to be an intern? You have my email and we have mutual friends who might even be willing to vouch for me!
So THAT was my ex’s “ex”-cuse for withholding during the honeymoon.
(And for several years afterwards …)
I’ve had so many friends that got married this summer (or are going to be married this winter) and there are definitely some who have had more than a slight case of the jitters. That’s why some of them are going to city hall, hosting a few friends at a local restaurant and calling it a day. Good luck, ladies!
The title to this entry led me to believe that Becca had been married.
How incendiary!
Readers, this is what happened:
I spent all morning in the library researching schizophrenia so I could be up to snuff for Liz’s blog. Then I showed up at work, totally psyched to delve into heady concepts about mental illness, and was sidetracked when a few editors liked a paragraph I wrote on Facebook about eco-friendly shoes. I spent 10 minutes on it, then spent hours writing a mental health post about the fear of aging.
But when I finished the post and had Liz read it, it turned out to be too crazy to post! Or just a little too rough around the edges. So I fell short and will have to do better next time. Sigh. Supervisors these days.
PND = regret for having spent far too much attention and expectation on one single day’s event.
To be fair, ‘PND’ is a lot easier to remember than ‘RFHSFTMAAEOOSDE’.
Wow. What losers. Apparently the concept of the marriage (the rest of your life) rather than the wedding (just one day) never occurred to them.
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